50 Shades of...Condoms, Butt Plugs, & Periods?!

Are there safer sex messages in the hit trilogy "50 Shades of Grey"? With so much controversy around the books, let's look at a few messages around condoms and appreciation of women's bodies.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker

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Dear Dr. Jenn - Anatomy Lesson for Anal Play

From: http://www.cavemag.com/how-important-is-sex-to-a-relationship/Dear Dr. Jenn~

I think it’s hot to put a finger in a girl’s butt when we are having sex doggy style. But it doesn’t always work and sometimes she says it hurts. What can I do about this?


Wannabe Anal Master

Dear Anal Master,

Anal play has become more and more popular, so thanks for your great question. First, make sure your partner is interested in experimenting with anal play. If she’s not into it, she’s going to have a hell of a time relaxing, and will likely experience pain. I don’t advise trying to ‘sneak it in’ without explicitly asking permission.

If you’re both on the same page about this, then you’re embarking into a realm of heightened pleasure. A short anatomy lesson can be helpful here. To enter the anus, you have to pass through two sets of anal sphincter muscles. The first set are voluntary muscles, which is why relaxation on the woman’s part is important. She can put her attention on that external muscle area, and choose to relax those muscles. However, the second ring of muscles is a different story. These internal muscles are involuntary, which means you can’t think your way into releasing them. However, they do respond to gentle, direct pressure.

From your side, Anal Master, knowing how to navigate these muscle rings is important. Playing around the outside of the anus with a well-lubed finger can help the woman concentrate on that area and relax the first sphincter muscles. Then gently pressing on the anus for several seconds will release the second set and allow access to the inside. For some women who are tense and nervous about this, it may take more time.

Remember to start small, slow, with a lot of lubricant, particularly a thicker lube made specifically for anal play. With a little preparation, patience, and knowledge, you can definitely become the Anal Master.

Be well,

Dr. Jenn

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Therapist, Sociologist, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker

Anal Bleaching! I'm open-minded, but this is ridiculous...

Anal bleaching is dying the skin of the anus a lighter color, for aesthetic reasons. It started in the porn industry and has moved into the mainstream a bit. It's a very sensitive area of the body, so there are some risks.  Need I say more?

Bend Over Boyfriend: What's up with the Male G-Spot?

This episode of "In the Den With Dr. Jenn", Spicy Suzy the Den Sex-pert stops by to discuss the male G-spot, why men may enjoy anal play, and why women might enjoy penetrating their partners.

Spicy Suzy
The Den Sex-pert

The Pope's current stance on condom use.


Anal Sex: Advice From a Gay Man to Straight Women

What do straight women need to know about anal play? This episode of "In the Den with Dr. Jenn" examines anal sex advice for women through the eyes of a gay man.

LGBT San Diego Comedian

V Fit San Diego

Tristan Taormino's website www.puckerup.com