The Intimacy of Sound and Rhythm

Dr. Jenn talks with Kat Fulton, a Music Therapist, about how sound, music, and rhythm can play an important role in sexuality.

SPECIAL GUEST:
Kat Fulton, MM, MT-BC, Music Therapist

THE DEN RECOMMEND:
Tantra of Sound, by Jonathan Goldman and Andi Goldman

Tantric Sex for Women's Healing and Pleasure

Dr. Jenn talks with Kamala Devi, a tantra, sex, and relationship coach, about sexual healing and modern day tantra. How can tantric sex assist in healing sexual wounds?

SPECIAL GUEST:
Kamala Devi, Tantra Teacher

THE DEN RECOMMEND:
Mating in Captivity, by Esther Perel

The value of Journaling for emotional expression

When counseling women and men, I often suggest journaling topics for homework. The topics are usually heavy or uncomfortable emotions, with questions to answer in a free-form writing assignment. Although some folks resist writing activities, I know that it can be a way to use stream of consciousness to tap into hidden beliefs and values. And the process can help get to the core of troubling emotional or behavioral patterns.

One of my specialties in couples counseling is facilitating between the different communication and emotional expression styles that women and men have. I just found the following discussion at About.com on Men's Health and the potential benefit of writing to specifically assist men in expressing emotions:

"A well known psychologist, James Pennebaker, has demonstrated that emotional expressions can benefit health by the simple device of keeping a diary. The diary provides a outlet for emotional expression and not only appears to have a positive emotional effect but improves immune function as well. In fact written emotional expression has been researched in terms of benefits to physical health, physiological functioning and daily living activities; in each case with positive findings. Could the simple act of keeping a diary be a useful compromise for men and bridge the gap between their inability to transmit, receive and manage emotional messages? (Source: adapted from Lee, C & Glynn Owens, R (2002) The Psychology of Men's Health. Open University Press.)"

I think writing a journal for one's own benefit is a powerful access to creativity and emotions. As well, I suggest writing letters to your partner if verbal expression of emotions is difficult for you. This is a great step towards strengthening your self expression and connection.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

What is bliss? Why is it worth "finding"?

I was lying flat on my mat. It was time for savasana at the conclusion of a rigorous yoga class. I felt happy and relaxed…but there was something else. It was an overwhelming feeling of joyful contentment. I was surprised to recognize that I was feeling blissful.

The term bliss is perhaps more often used regarding sensual delights such as consuming a dark chocolate ganache, the deep calm after experiencing waves of multiple orgasm, or the emotional context of a wedding. I believe there are many paths to bliss. I think the yoga class opened a pathway to bliss because of its holistic approach to the body. Not only did I physically exert myself, but I was also mentally proud of my accomplishments and emotionally soothed through the deep breathing. Socially I had created positive energy and shared this connection with other yoga students. And spiritually I felt integrated as a full being.

What comes to mind when you think of bliss for yourself? What contexts and experiences induce blissful feelings? It can be helpful to use a holistic breakdown to approach this topic, like I did with my yoga example. Are there activities that merge many facets of yourself and open the space for bliss? We all have experiences that assist in achieving this state, whether it’s a massage, the flow of dance movements, viewing an expansive vista on a hike, or watching a baby sleep. Choosing these means you are exposing yourself to experiences that allow for your release to the splendor of the moment.

Why do we care about bliss? If there is an opposite state to stress and anxiety, this is it. Perhaps bliss is always within us, available to tap into by removing blocks and accepting what is there. Regardless of how you find it, creating paths to your own bliss can help remind you that it’s all going to be ok. And that’s a beautiful feeling.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

Love Your Body Day 2009 - San Diego Press Release

Love Your Body Day Expo Educates Women About Body Image and Holistic Health

San Diego, CA—October 7. A Love Your Body Day event will take place in a Little Italy wine bar and offer a San Diego flair to this national day. Celebrating women, health, and appreciating deeper beauty, the expo on Thursday, October 22, runs 5-8pm at Tango Wine Company (2161 India Street). Local female professionals who specialize in health, fitness, and well being coming from a variety of perspectives will be on hand to teach, offer resources, and entertain.

The NOW (National Organization for Women) Foundation’s Women’s Health Project launched the Love Your Body Day campaign in 1998. This day formed as a national day of action to speak out against advertisements and images of women that are harmful, offensive, and demeaning. Each year on Love Your Body Day women around the country say “no” to twisted beauty standards and hazardous advertisements by holding rallies, speakers, house parties, classroom discussions and more.

This San Diego celebration of Love Your Body Day is a free event to proactively encourage women to honor and appreciate their bodies. Education, activities, and healthy snacks will be available from practitioners addressing women’s holistic health and well being, including nutrition, sex & intimacy counseling, massage, expressive arts therapy, dance, yoga, and acupuncture.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, PhD, a sociologist who works as a relationship & intimacy counselor is spearheading this event. To learn more about the event, visit: www.drjennsden.com/LoveYourBodyDay2009. To contact Dr. Jenn, call 858-880-5944 or email Jennifer@drjennsden.com.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

Taking it All to the Mat: Yoga as a Panacea?

My intention for the new year is to honor my body. So this week I signed up for three months of unlimited yoga. Half-way through the first class, as my sweat made the mat too slippery for firm positioning, I questioned what the hell I was doing. But now 4 classes later, I am reminded of the power of yoga for balance and joy.

Yesterday was an odd day and I was feeling under the weather, both physically and emotionally. Yet knowing that I would be attending a 5:30pm yoga class took the edge off the day a bit. In the first child's pose, I smiled with my face to the mat, because I knew the next hour was sacred time for me to be present with me. During the final shavasana, I usually relax and smile with the thought of what I get to eat when I go home (food is a motivator for me). But last evening I noticed myself mentally escaping and brought my awareness back to my body. I can already feel my spine straightening more. I'm aware of muscles in my abs and ass I haven't felt in quite some time. I feel more aware of and appreciative of what my body is capable of doing. And I felt peaceful and happy.

I'm thrilled that for the next three months (at the least) I'll be taking it all the mat. For me, a regular yoga practice is such a positive and holistically balanced outlet for stress, anxiety, frustration, fear, and sadness. By the end of an hour I had a great workout...and life just makes more sense.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego