Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, sociologist and sexologist, writes her sex advice and gender commentary blog. The sex blog includes relationship advice, free sex education videos, sex tips, sex-positive mindfulness, and podcast interviews.
In this episode of "In the Den With Dr. Jenn," the Fertility Goddess Donna McIntosh, MHN, CHFS, stops by to talk about fertility, infertility, nutrition, and sexuality. How does diet impact fertility for women?
GUEST
Donna McIntosh, MHN, CHFS
SEXUAL FUN FACT
True or False: Caffeine negatively impacts a man's fertility?
DEN RECOMMEND
Infertility Journeys by Lesley Vance
In this episode of "In the Den With Dr. Jenn," yoga instructor Kirsten Selway stops by the Den to discuss the benefits of yoga for a better sex life.
GUEST
Kirsten Selway of Birdrock Yoga
SEXUAL FUN FACT
Where are women injecting silicone, to make themselves look sexier to others?
POSITION OF THE DAY
Firing the Human Cannonball
DEN RECOMMEND
Slim Calm Sexy Yoga by Tara Stiles
I can handle your telling me
what I did or didn't do.
And I can handle your interpretations
but please don't mix the two.
If you want to confuse any issue,
I can tell you how to do it:
Mix together what I do
with how you react to it.
Tell me that you're disappointed
with the unfinished chores you see,
But calling me "irresponsible"
is no way to motivate me.
And tell me that you're feeling hurt
when I say "no" to your advances,
But calling me a frigid man
won't increase your future chances.
Yes, I can handle your telling me
what I did or didn't do,
And I can handle your interpretations,
but please don't mix the two."
~Marshall Rosenberg, Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life
Even with our best intentions when communicating in an intimate relationship, we often speak or listen from judgement and conflict. Social psychological research shows us that people do not like to feel attacked or blamed. They get defensive. They might lash back. And then we lash back. This can create a cycle of anger, self-righteousness, and irrationality. Marshall Rosenerg's quote above speaks to the value in separating observation from interpretation. This is a powerful first step to start breaking unhelpful cycles in a relationship.
When broaching a painful or upsetting topic, first state the facts you observed, without any other meaning attached. Be careful not to use any "loaded" language, but just state the objective facts. Then state how you interpreted it (i.e., what it meant to you) and how you felt about it. Although we often conflate observation and interpretation, they are quite separate entities. Making this separation allows you to own your emotions and reactions, without making them "facts" about what occurred. This gives your partner the space to hear you, with less chance of defensiveness.
Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling
~Healthy Sexuality & Happy Relationships in San Diego~
www.drjennsden.com
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Jim Chialtas, L.Ac., stops by to discuss building sexual energy, in this episode of "In the Den With Dr. Jenn." He offers some unusual and powerful tips to build sexual energy and connection.
SPECIAL GUEST
Jim Chialtas, L.Ac.
www.laurelacupuncturesd.com
SEXUAL FUN FACT
What one thing, if sniffed by men, will reduce their sexual arousal?
WHAT'S THAT WORD
Acomoclitic
Come behind the scenes in a video production studio during a talk show about sex! Be in the audience and cheer on other folks in the sex field.
Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, AASECT presenter and San Diego local, will be interviewing several AASECT members during this special video shoot, including Mark Schoen, Tammy Nelson, Neil Cannon, and Katherine Forsythe.
WHEN & WHERE?
Friday, April 29, 2011
7:00pm – 8:30pm (it’s important to be prompt for shooting purposes)
Downtown San Diego (about 15 blocks from the hotel)
Complimentary snacks & wine!
Please call or text and let Dr. Jenn know you’ll be attending. You will then receive a message back with the address! 858-880-5944
(This is for AASECT only, who are attending the annual AASECT conference in San Diego, 2011.)
Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling
~Healthy Sexuality & Happy Relationships in San Diego~
www.drjennsden.com
Follow me on Twitter
"Like" me on Facebook
Ellen Sarver Dolgen stops by to talk about a shmirshky, perimenopause, and menopause, in this episode of "In the Den With Dr. Jenn." She discusses ways to feel like yourself during this natural process.
SPECIAL GUEST
Ellen Sarver Dolgen
SEXUAL FUN FACT
How is botox being used in the sexual realm?
DEN RECOMMEND
Design your own dildo!
Dr. Jenn is a sociologist and relationship & sexuality speaker who challenges our cultural beliefs around sex, sexual consent, gender roles, and health intimacy, with a mindfulness and compassionate approach. Her site includes a sex blog, free sex education videos, sexuality speaking information, and mindfulness resources.
