What is Mindful Sex? Mindfulness, Women, & Intimacy

Mindfulness and sex - my two favorite topics to talk about! And who better to discuss mindful sex with, than the sexpert couple in Tampa, FL, who refer to themselves as The Love Birds! (Which totally makes sense, because they've been married a long time, they are sex and love experts, and their last name is Bird!) I met these two a few years ago at the annual AASECT sexuality conference, where we hit it off immediately. Chuck and JoAnn Bird are good people. So I was thrilled when they asked to interview me for their weekly radio show Intimate Chat with the Love Birds.

*Click here to open a new window that will play the radio interview.*

I join their show at around the 18-minute point. We discuss how mindfulness is vitally important to breaking negative relationship patterns, what's needed for female sexual empowerment, and tips to put mindfulness into action. We also explain our running joke about Nut Porn ;) Have a listen and let me know what you think about sex and mindfulness!

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker, Sociologist

A Surprising Answer to Sex Problems: Mindfulness for Sex Therapy and Sex Coaching

Boring sex? Pain during intercourse? Distracted in bed? Sex addiction? No desire to get it on? Is it possible that all these sexual concerns and sex problems could have the same remedy? Yes, and that remedy is the ancient Buddhist practice of mindfulness.

Mindfulness is an awareness skill of being present in the moment, with your thoughts, emotions, and sensations. It is noticing the present moment and – here’s the kicker – not judging what you notice. The health benefits of mindfulness are profound: stress reduction, decline in anxiety, depression relapse prevention, overcoming addiction, and reducing chronic pain, not to mention greater happiness and fulfillment in life.

Researchers are also delving into the sexual realm to see how mindfulness can improve sex lives. Although little research has been done so far, it seems to be beneficial for women with low desire, vulva pain, and emotional distress from past sexual trauma. There is anecdotal evidence that it is valuable for sex “addiction,” erectile dysfunctions, and boredom.

I’ve been integrating mindfulness-based practices into my sex coaching and couples intimacy work for several years because I think it’s the foundation for all personal growth, and some sex therapists use it as well. Do you freak out with jealousy if your boyfriend receives a text from another woman? Mindfulness can help break that automatic pattern. Are you distracted during sex by your perception of your bulging belly or your long chore list to to-do items? Mindfulness skills keep you grounded in the moment and release such mind chatter. Integrating little daily practices of mindfulness can make these big brain changes.

I have mindfulness on my brain more than usual this week, because I just went to a sex conference this weekend. Its not as sexually titillating as it may sound, but it will be intellectually titillating. At this 2012 annual conference for AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, & Therapists) in Austin, TX, I will be speaking on “Get Out of Your Head & Into Your Body: Improving Sex Lives Through Mindfulness.” My take home message for the audience? Mindfulness is the new sexy.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Coach, Marriage Coach, Sexologist, College Sexual Health Speaker

(This was originally posted as part of Pacific San Diego Magazine's sex & love blog series.)

Special AASECT Video Podcast Shoot in San Diego

Come behind the scenes in a video production studio during a talk show about sex! Be in the audience and cheer on other folks in the sex field.

Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, AASECT presenter and San Diego local, will be interviewing several AASECT members during this special video shoot, including Mark Schoen, Tammy Nelson, Neil Cannon, and Katherine Forsythe.

Friday, April 29, 2011
7:00pm – 8:30pm (it’s important to be prompt for shooting purposes)
Downtown San Diego (about 15 blocks from the hotel)
Complimentary snacks & wine!

Please call or text and let Dr. Jenn know you’ll be attending. You will then receive a message back with the address! 858-880-5944

(This is for AASECT only, who are attending the annual AASECT conference in San Diego, 2011.)

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling
~Healthy Sexuality & Happy Relationships in San Diego~
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