November 23, 2009

Ask Dr. Jenn - Get Free Advice in New Facebook Application!

November 23, 2009/ Jennifer Gunsaullus

Interested in bringing creativity to your relationship?
Adding a kick to your bedroom play?
Feeling a lift in your daily inspiration?

The new "Ask Dr. Jenn" Facebook application gives you free advice in all three of these areas. If you like the advice, you can post it to your wall for others to see, or post it to a friend's wall to spread the fun suggestions.

Access Ask Dr. Jenn Facebook Application here!

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

September 15, 2009

Quick Fix for Sexless Relationships?

September 15, 2009/ Jennifer Gunsaullus

If you've experienced how verbose I am about any sexual or relationship topic, you won't be surprised to hear me respond NO to the above query. However, there are two basic questions you can ask yourself to start digging at the foundation of a lackluster sex life:

What does having sex mean to you?
What does not having sex mean to you?

When I write "mean," I'm referring to the compelling emotions surrounding these questions. For example, one woman I presented the first question to exploded, "What does it mean? It means I'm just taking care of my husband like I have to take care of the house, the kids, and my clients at work." Yikes. Lots of underlying resentments. Generally resentments represent needs that aren't being met. In this case, she was not feeling nurtured and cared for, and feeling overwhelmed with emotionally managing so many others.

In another case, I asked a male client in a "sexless" marriage what not having sex meant to him. He sadly replied that he was unable to have a level of closeness and intimacy he craved, intimacy that made him feel good about himself and connected to his wife. Having sex with his wife validated his self worth as a man and a loving husband.

When sex is "missing" in a relationship, just trying to spice up the excitement level rarely addresses the depth of the hurt, resentments, and walls that have built up. Gently pulling back the layers of hurt and disconnect and replacing them with appreciation and vulnerability (with a kick of creativity) is the best "quick fix" I can recommend.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

July 01, 2009

Women & Intimacy Series - Workshops at Tango Wine!

July 01, 2009/ Jennifer Gunsaullus

I will be conducting a set of 3 workshops at Tango Wine for the Women & Intimacy Series! For 3 months in a row, starting in July, women will be gathering for these fun, interactive, and lively events.

GOT PASSION?
~Lecture I of Tango Wine's Women & Intimacy Series~

Maintain or improve your passionate spark with sensuality, juiciness, and mindfulness!

Date: Wednesday, July 22
To find out more, click on this Calendar Link.

KEYS TO HAPPY RELATIONSHIPS
~Lecture II of Tango Wine's Women & Intimacy Series~

Gain insights and skills to immediately improve communication and appreciation.

Date: Wednesday, August 19
To find out more, click on this Calendar Link.

INTIMACY & PLAY
~Lecture III of Tango Wine's Women & Intimacy Series~

Kick start your bedroom creativity with fun and erotic play tips.

Date: Wednesday, September 23
To find out more, click on this Calendar Link.

Contact Dr. Jenn with questions or to reserve a space for any or all of the workshops!

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

April 07, 2009

Erotic Play Lecture at San Diego Mensa Regional Gathering

April 07, 2009/ Jennifer Gunsaullus

Erotic Play - Making Intimacy Sexier
at the San Diego Mensa Regional Gathering

The opportunities for pleasure and fun in intimacy are limited only by our creativity. Learn how to tap into a holistic perspective to improve sensuality, explore the options of sexual toys, and delve into the world of fantasy. This interactive workshop will leave attendees ready to apply new ideas to their own sensual living.

Date: May 23, 2009
Time: 3:30-4:30pm
Place: San Diego Hilton Mission Valley

For more information, visit HERE.

Jennifer Gunsaullus, Ph.D.

Sex Therapy & Relationship Counseling in San Diego

December 23, 2008

The Erotic Mind - What Are Your Peak Sexual Experiences?

December 23, 2008/ Jennifer Gunsaullus

While I'm home in PA for the holidays with my family, I'm reading The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin, PhD. This book was recommended through the AASECT (a professional sexuality organization) listserve, and with a subheading of "Unlocking the inner sources of sexual passion and fulfillment," how could I not be intrigued both personally and professionally?!

I haven't read that far into the book yet, but I am very pleased with the author's writing style and outside the box thinking. Instead of taking the standard "what's wrong" approach to sexual therapy and counseling, he starts with questions about peak sexual experiences and fantasies. This is a way to learn more about your erotic turn-ons, how you've tapped into that in the past, and setting the groundwork to create more passion in the future.

Thinking back, what were your most sexually arousing situations? What were the details and circumstances? Why do you think it was so arousing? The interesting thing here is that sometimes our most arousing memories don't involve sexual intercourse or even explicit sexual activity. It could be visual stimuli, or an attraction, or a desire. Or it could be a complex and wild and debauchous! It's a great way to focus on what has worked well for you in the past, and be creative in how to bring more of that to your erotic fulfillment.