Blog - Essays, Articles, Videos, and Tips
I am so happy to be hosting this event on September 23, 2016, in San Diego! This is a really impressive documentary (and funny!) around a natural topic that is continually shamed and stigmatized. Plus, I'm really proud to say that I am one of the sex experts interviewed in the film.Read More
Self-love can be a tough topic for women. From childhood to now, you may have heard messages that you're not good enough, you're not pretty enough, you're not smart enough, you're too loud...I'm happy to announce that I'm one of the more than 21 experts in a Women Learning to Love video summit that launched today...Read More
There are many ways to sexually please a woman. And all women are different. Nonetheless, when the sex editor at Men's Health Magazine came to me and asked for my top tips for pleasing a woman, I offered a few suggestions that I hoped their male readers would add to their sexual tool belts.Read More
It’s a few weeks into the new year – have your resolutions already fallen by the wayside? Did you swear off fatty foods, cigarettes, and excessive drinking, or commit yourself to lose weight, eat healthier, and keep a budget, only to find yourself slipping into old habits? These are all worthy intentions for the new year, but I think a different approach, especially when applied to improving sex and relationships, can keep you on track this whole year long.
Choose one relationship or sexual improvement goal this year, and continually work towards developing that. For example, do you and your partner struggle when it comes to communication? If so, each month create a small plan about how you’re going to work on that. Perhaps you could start in January with each writing a list of your needs, irritations, and resentments and kindly discuss them with each other. Then in February you can each choose two needs and present a plan on how they could be better met in your relationship. Each month you can add on a new component or communication mode. There’s no right or wrong way to do this; just keep plugging along.
Of if your goal for the year is to learn more about your sexual pleasure, desire, and arousal, choose a different aspect of this to explore each month. You could start with reading through Amazon reviews on books about sexual pleasure, and find one that piques your interest. Next month you could take a class, have a vulnerable conversation with a friend, purchase a new sexual toy, try a lubricant, etc. Anything that builds towards your big picture goal of sexual pleasure knowledge.
One of the most important ways to stay true to your new year’s goals is to have a plan and review it regularly for sustainability and accountability. Set your phone alarm for every Sunday evening as a reminder to review your intention and reflect on whether you’ve taken steps towards or away from that. Then write down ideas for that week of how you’re going to take a step in the right direction. Intentions are a work in progress, so continue to identify what works and what doesn’t for you, and apply that feedback to create success.
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sex Therapist, Sexuality Speaker, Sexologist
I was recently interviewed by ANTIVIEW, a site that brings creativity and challenge back to journalism and interviewing. The questions were the opposite of what I'm used to, e.g, What am I not? How doesn't someone become a sex expert? I have included the first portion of the interview below, but please click on the link to go to the ANTIVIEW site to read the rest!
WHAT ARE YOU NOT?
I do not sleep with my clients or watch them have sex.
I am not a psychologist or a marriage and family therapist.
I do not have orgies on the weekends (although I’m not opposed to the idea!).
I’m not ungrounded or “woo-woo,” although I do take a holistic approach to my work.
I am not a man-hater, although I identify with feminism, and I do not take sides in my counseling work.
I do not make people feel bad about being sexual under their own terms and by their own definitions.
There are a lot of assumptions about my kind of work, so it’s fun to be able to articulate, off the bat, what I am not!
Read the rest of the article at ANTIVIEW.
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Therapist, Sexologist, Sex Expert, Sociologist