Why You Should “Bonjour” the H*** out of Your Partner

Why You Should “Bonjour” the H*** out of Your Partner

“You Americans are so self-involved and rude,” the Parisian said to me from behind his counter. He could have been plucked from the "indignant French hotelier" category from central casting.  My eyes widened and my cheeks grew hot. I was 28 years old and in Paris for the first time. I had celebrated the 2001 New Year…

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Permission to Embrace a New Facet of You

Permission to Embrace a New Facet of You

I have always loved Halloween and the excuse to dress up in a costume. This photo is from a party earlier this month with the theme of Glam Rock. This idea of dressing in costume and trying on a new character is related to my work in the intimacy and relationship field in multiple ways. The most obvious is role-playing…

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20 Happenings: A Powerful Way to Do Year-End Reflections

20 Happenings: A Powerful Way to Do Year-End Reflections

As we approach the end of the year, it's valuable to take a moment to reflect on our achievements and the things that brought us joy. Many people don't take the time to appreciate their successes or savor their joyful moments because they're too focused on their next task or goal, or because they're caught up in their worries. But regularly feeling gratitude…

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How Many Pennies Will You Pick Up in Your Marriage?

How Many Pennies Will You Pick Up in Your Marriage?

When I was a senior in college, my boyfriend and I committed to picking up all the loose change we found and collecting it in one big jar. This was from 1994 to 1995. By the summer of 1995, we had collected $128.47. We attended a wedding that summer and paid for the weekend trip with our found money (and at age 22, this felt amazing). Not surprisingly, much of the change was pennies.

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Pain During Sex - The Pain Perception Project For Women

Pain During Sex - The Pain Perception Project For Women

“It hurts when we have sex.” When a woman in my intimacy coaching private practice shares this with me, I know it can mean many things. A while ago in a nationally-representative sex research study, one-third of the women indicated that they had recently experienced pain in a sexual encounter…

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3 Keys to Thriving Intimacy in Your Marriage

3 Keys to Thriving Intimacy in Your Marriage

Are you able to accept change? Intimacy, whether in the form of emotional closeness or sexual connection, changes throughout a long-term relationship. Shifts in your intimate connections are inevitable, because: Priorities change. Families change. Jobs change. Needs change. Hormones change. Bodies change….

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