My Experiences with Online Dating

The HAPpY Hour San Diego Radio

An Alpine, CA, radio station invited me into their studio to discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly about online dating. I've been dabbling with it for the past year and a half, and shared some personal stories about what I like and don't like. But just when the interview was evolving and we were delving into why couples struggle with desire in relationships, the electricity went out in the building so my interview was over! Nonetheless, if you want to hear me banter with four men about online dating, check out my interview with Rich Singley below. 

My segment of the show begins at around the one hour and 14 minute mark.

The HAPpY Hour San Diego Radio Magazine 10.29.2105 #103 Jacob Underwood (OTown) Alpine Beer, Dr Jenn by Happy Hour San Diego on Mixcloud

 ~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sexual Health Educator, Sociologist

Can Fear Be Good for Our Sex Life?

We generally think that fear is a bad thing for our relationships and sex lives. But maybe not?

Shortly before Halloween, I spoke on San Diego Living about the potential relationship benefits of fear, and how you can consciously bring this into your relationship for fun all year long!

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus -- San Diego Sexologist, Sexual Health Speaker, Sociologist

Sex Tips for Tent Camping

Does camping in nature inspire your friskiness? Or does the experience of bugs, dirt, discomfort, and stinkiness quash your libido? I believe that the fresh air and relaxation, with your evenings by a campfire, can offer some outside the box opportunities for sexual connection and play.

"What are the most important things to make sex more enjoyable when camping?" I asked my friends this past weekend. We were seated around the picnic table, enjoying two days and nights of tent camping in a Julian, CA, campground for the 4th of July weekend. And although I was sleeping alone in my tent, I felt inspired to write a blog about sexy time when camping. After some joking and cajoling, our group mind came up with some pretty good tips. (Note: These tips are more specific to campground camping in a tent, instead of RV camping or hardcore backcountry camping.)

1. Comfort. For comfort's sake, I really recommend an air mattress. I understand that this is the opposite of hardcore camping, but for most folks, the physical and mental rigors of "real" camping just won't evoke sexy feelings. I suggest a higher quality self-inflatable air mattress that does not leak air during the night. Otherwise, the hard ground under your butt or knees while trying to roll around in passion can just mean painful sex.

2. Cleanliness. Consider cleanliness and odors, particularly depending on how important these are to each of you. It's great if there are showers and bathrooms available, to keep up with your normal hygiene patterns. If not, bring some wet wipes and baby wipes (for genitals) to spruce up. I also recommend paper towels and water in your tent. All of these can be helpful for before, during, and after sexual play.

3. Privacy. If you or your partner are self-conscious about noise or creating sexy shadow puppets on your tent walls, choose your spot carefully. If possible, choose a tent spot that is in a more secluded area and doesn't have a bright light that will shine on your tent.

4. Slow down. Are you camping at a higher altitude? Then slow down, because even if you're in good physical shape, the exertion of sexual activity with less oxygen can leave your heart pounding -- and not in a good way!

5. Teasing. Also in terms of taking a slower approach, why not start your erotic exchange earlier in the evening by the campfire? Campfires can feel romantic, relaxing, and mindful. Tap into this calm, non-goal-oriented energy to kick things off. This can go in so many directions, such as kissing, touching genitals or breasts through clothing, offering sexual words of affirmation to each other, or sharing sexual fantasies.

6. Bugs. And finally, be aware of bugs such as mosquitoes that can get into your tent. Do a flashlight search of your tent at nighttime to guarantee you won't have mosquitoes nipping at your ass during sex!

One last thought: If you're looking to use your camping time to specifically spice up your sexual play, consider bringing along some new toys, lubes, or sensual items. The highly regarded company Good Vibrations has some sex toy ideas that may be a perfect accompaniment to your weekend romp. 

I hope you now feel ready to add some spice to your camping this summer!

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sociologist, Sexuality Speaker

Orgasm too quickly? Afraid to initiate sex?

I answered two common sex questions in the March issue of Pacific San Diego Magazine. These questions delve into common misunderstandings and fears about sexual health and communication. The first one was from a young man whose girlfriend told him he came too quickly. And the second question is from a woman who doesn't know how to initiate sex with her husband without feeling ridiculous. Check out my answers below or at the At First Blush page.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sex Sociologist, Sexual Health Speaker

New Year, New Love -- Love & Sex Intentions

Last Friday I got to be on KUSI News and Good Morning San Diego for the first time, talking about ways to focus on your relationships and sex life in the new year. The morning producer brought up a good point - resolutions and intentions tend to focus on our individual needs...but what about focusing on improving our primary relationship?

I suggest a three-step process:

1) What's not working in your relationship and sex life? Write this down and get clear on it. What is your role in this?

2)What is your vision of a happy, satisfied, and connected relationship? Be clear on what direction you're headed.

3) At the start of every month this year, choose one thing to focus on that prioritizes improving what's listed under #1 and moves you in the direction of #2.

I discuss why scheduling is so important, offer ideas to prioritize at the start of each month, and I also give a suggestion to folks who are single and a bit jaded with the dating experience.

KUSI News - San Diego, CA

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sociologist, Sexual Health Speaker

Top "Vagina" Trend of 2014

With so many ridiculous suggestions for how to "beautify" our genitals, this was my favorite "vagina" trend of 2014.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus -- San Diego Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker & Sociologist